Page 3 of 16 FirstFirst 1234513 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 160

Thread: How many of you are married?

  1. #21
    Regular Contributor Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    79
    Credits
    7

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by anon View Post
    Damn, am I the only dirty cheater on here?

    Yes I'm married, but despite my reasonably young age, I feel like our marriage is just a friendship now. Intimacy is pretty much dead (haven't had sex with her for over a year - she's just not interested, and hasn't been since our son was born), which is why I've had the ocassional indiscretion.
    This is a very interesting subject. I was married, but no longer. My wife and i had a great sex life right up until the day our son was born. The day she came out of hospital she was a different person. Not the slightest bit interested in sex. It was pretty much the sole reason for our marriage breaking down. Getting rejected every night really knocked my confidence and i believed she was no longer attracted to me. All sorts of things went through my head, like, if she`s not interested in me is she interested in someone else?? It caused alot of resentment between us.
    I believe its not an uncommon thing, and happens alot in marriages and relationships.
    When i met her, it was the best time in my life, and when we got married i believed it would be forever. I still love her to bits, and every time i see her(which is all the time because of our son) i feel gutted that she is not the same happy person i met all those years ago, and that i probably contributed greatly to her being the way she is now.
    I couldn`t even guess the amount of times i organised a nice evening hoping that it would lead to intimacy, and then getting turned down flat. Its a terrible feeling laying next to someone in bed that you love desperately and knowing you can`t touch them.
    Its going to be hard when she inevitably gets a boyfriend and i look at him and wonder what he`s got that i haven`t.
    I`ve accepted things now for the way they are, but i think it will be a long time before i could consider going into another serious relationship after all the pain and suffering i`ve gone through over the last few years.
    I am a hopeless romantic(possibly to my detriment) and the last few years has really left me questioning to myself whether true love does exist.

  2. #22
    nawayy's Avatar AF 500 Club Member Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    By the beach
    Posts
    521
    Reviews Given
    1
    Credits
    5,724

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by anon View Post
    Damn, am I the only dirty cheater on here?

    Yes I'm married, but despite my reasonably young age, I feel like our marriage is just a friendship now. Intimacy is pretty much dead (haven't had sex with her for over a year - she's just not interested, and hasn't been since our son was born), which is why I've had the ocassional indiscretion.
    Nope yer not, me too, and some similar sounding issues but a longer sexless timeline before I started having WL liaisons

  3. #23
    ace's Avatar AF Millennium Member Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    all over the place
    Posts
    1,542
    Credits
    225

    Default

    Well, ignoring Ulrich, as we all should, I think there have been some good posts that ring true from a married male perspective (good one, guys) and I guess it's not uncommon for the situation to go on for 10-20 years for some of the reasons the Saint has offered. In my own case, it's not because of boredom, but a conscious decision I have made to improve my own perceived quality of life.

    Everyone has their own stuff to deal with, and chooses to solve issues in their own way. Since "seeking professional assistance", I have definitely been a nicer person to be around, and as a bonus have met some great people who I thoroughly enjoy being with (and who I may not have ever met otherwise)!

    But the main reason of this post was to reply to Studley's movie anecdote - mate, much as I love my wife, I don't think of her when horizontal ...I'm just savouring the moment...

  4. #24
    Century Contributor Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Auckland
    Posts
    238
    Credits
    1,916

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by S Templar View Post
    TMy wife and i had a great sex life right up until the day our son was born. The day she came out of hospital she was a different person. Not the slightest bit interested in sex. ............

    I believe its not an uncommon thing, and happens alot in marriages and relationships............
    Same with me except we're still married.... It's been 10 years now since our daughter was born. We have a good relationship apart from the sex. I've always thought that "some day" we'd get over this......

  5. #25
    ace's Avatar AF Millennium Member Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    all over the place
    Posts
    1,542
    Credits
    225

    Default

    This is great - just like male therapy. Now let's form a circle for a group hug and bang out a couple of verses of "Kumbaya"...

  6. #26
    Conrad 's Avatar AF Jedi Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    voyagersplace.com
    Posts
    6,018
    Credits
    36,205

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ace View Post
    This is great - just like male therapy. Now let's form a circle for a group hug and bang out a couple of verses of "Kumbaya"...
    You can hold Ulrich's hand ......

  7. #27
    ace's Avatar AF Millennium Member Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    all over the place
    Posts
    1,542
    Credits
    225

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Conrad View Post
    You can hold Ulrich's hand ......
    Nah, he's not invited... still on the naughty step.

  8. #28
    Century Contributor Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Somewhere on earth
    Posts
    238
    Credits
    166,846,767,816

    Default

    Married? No. But in a long term, loving but ironically sex-less relationship. A lot of the stereotypes and surprises are present in our relationship. She's often too tired from work for any sex and (I think - she's never been willing to open up in this respect) there are aspects of her past that makes her unwilling to engage in "full blown" sex. And for whatever reason, sexual sparks have never flown between us. Everything prior to "full blown" is great; everything else after = not very.

    Out of consideration for her and I guess also for want of time, we've given up on it. Reaching this stage actually made our relationship much stronger. Despite my other head getting little satisfaction from the relationship, we know for a fact that we're still madly in love with each other. One hug from her or a kiss from her moves the world for me.

    So where do I get my satisfaction? Two years ago she told me out of the blue that I have her permission to visit working ladies, which I (now) very occasionally do. We also both share a best friend and this lady is a "forever single" type. The three of us are fairly open minded and the two of them presented a "friends with benefits" arrangement to me where me and our friend would just satisfy each other's needs about once or twice a month. I, of course, took it. Now have a wonderful sex life (that doesn't impinge upon our friendship) and still get to be in a great relationship with the woman I love.

    A bit weird for someone of my relative young age to be in this situation but it has worked out best for everyone concerned.

  9. #29
    Regular Contributor Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    wanganui
    Posts
    51
    Credits
    2

    Default married

    married yup thats me 20 yrs still get on great 2 kids, have every toy i want .great sex but a change is good for me so i wander and see these lovely ladies and have a good time. as you see on my pics we do have good fun lol.

  10. #30
    FrenchFry's Avatar Century Contributor Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Wellington
    Posts
    202
    Credits
    2

    Default

    Its interesting to hear how many sex lives were (temporarily) scuttled because of kids....a friend of mine had the same scenario which he escaped when the marriage finally collapsed.

    I'm not married and don't ever intend to have children. The final nail in the coffin of either of those "dreams" has just arrived. Thanks all (as if I needed the motivation)

    But really, is this quite common?: wife has a bubba, she want no more boom-boom.

    If its really really common, then it should be publicised. Who needs a one-child policy like China to sort out world overpopulation then?

User Tag List

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •