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Thread: whats it like to be a sexchange?

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    Lightbulb whats it like to be a sexchange?

    At the risk of getting another round of personal attacks, here is something good people might like to ponder. This is not whinging or wimping as I am totally happy and comfortable with who and what I am. A sexchange. A female. I dont seek anyones sympathy thanks.
    While the GAY community has become alot more accepted these days, TS are still discriminated against heavily. Why? because people dont understand us and the unknown scares people. Its getting better tho as more and more of us are coming out and answering peoples questions. Carmen and Georgina did alot of good. Lack of knowledge causes alot of misconception. The word 'transgender' has become the word used to cover all in the trans community but infact i believe it is used incorrectly and I no longer use it. Transgender means to cross from one gender to the other. A CD is not a transgender. A male may dress as a female but he is still a male.
    I am not and nor have I ever been GAY or homosexual but I get on well with those who are.
    T's go through enormous stress in transitioning because of emotional pressures, hormones, financial loss, victimisation, loss of loved ones, job loss and more. If you haven't been there, how can you understand.
    Coming to terms with understanding oneself, being open about who and what you are, learning to accept a change in your sexuality are huge things.
    I speak up and out so that people have a chance to understand Trans so if you want to ask questions of me, please do. I will answer all reasonable questions and debate but I am not here for ridicule and will not stand personal attacks.
    I put this up to stimulate thought and understanding with tolerance.

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    Good post, I am quite sure the TS movement will come just as it did for gays but I fear it will be some time away before that happens.

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    Beat me to it Kiwihorn, good post Storm & let's hope the resident trolls treat it with the respect it deserves and put their own prejudices & insecurities aside for a change.

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    Quote Originally Posted by kiwihorn View Post
    Good post, I am quite sure the TS movement will come just as it did for gays but I fear it will be some time away before that happens.
    Strangely enough, I think generally, acceptance is coming quicker then most realise. The abuse and incensitfity given the other day was the worst I have recieved in 4 years to be honest. Generally I have found it amazing how I can sit in a bar and people will come up and talk and ask questions politely. When I lived in Mt Maunganui, I drank with wharfies, fishermen and truckies and had no issues and alot of friends. Here on K Rd, I have had no problems and feel well respected. There are more and more TS about and it is changing.

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    Like Kiwi I too believe change will come......but it will only come as people with the courage of their convictions stand up and express their thoughts and feelings as you have done with this thread Storm.
    Well done.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marcus-FH View Post
    Like Kiwi I too believe change will come......but it will only come as people with the courage of their convictions stand up and express their thoughts and feelings as you have done with this thread Storm.
    Well done.
    Im no hero or anything special but appreciate the comments. Most TS are usually happy people in themselves but hormones are hard to get used to and therefore TS are often seen as irratic, irrational, fluffy, emotional and more. It takes time for a TS to get to understand hormones and thier effects on oneself. Time to realise while we dont bleed, we do have periods and all the other effects that go with them. I am on likely 4x what most Dr would recommend but I believe I have good reasons and know the risks, benefits and effects. Most people say I am pretty stable for a TS. thanks again.

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    It is hard for people to understand us and one of the reasons is the meanings of the terms used. Alas often we T's dont agree on the definitions so that doesnt make it easier for str8 folk to understand. Here are some of my definitions and the way I see them.
    Transsexual TS - actually the word is incorrect and there is no such word really. If anything it should be Transsex but it is used to describe a person with a body that doesnt match the brain. MtF or Ftm. They are often on hormones and therefore likely in an MtF to stop them from getting an erection. If they have a penis, they dont like it recognised or to use it but working Trans will allow it because it goes with the job. they strive to be as fem as possible. Its not about 'sex' but about 'gender' to them. The most recognised medical belief these days is that it is something that happens within the developing fetus, some 8 weeks after conception and well before birth that causes this.
    MtF = male to female. Alas to often noticeable.
    FtM = female to male. Lots more around then most realise. I have been amazed. They often pass easily or are just seen as an effeminite male.
    Shemale - Usually still male. Not on a proper hormone regime as they still want to get it up and use it. Often will have had a boob job and be big breasted.
    Crossdresser/ Transvestite (CD/TV) - usually men who like to dress as women and often, but not always, for sexual gratification. Some just like the feel of sexy lingere or the different fabric textures. Some CD/TV are true Transsexuals just starting thier journey.
    DragQueens - men who dress OTT outlandishly female and are performers. Some are Bi and some str8.
    Transgender The word I hate as it should be someone who has crossed fully from one gender to the other. A sexchange (or should that be a gender change) Alas the word has been taken and used to lump all in the too hard basket. So it covers TS, CD, TV, intersex, DQ and more these days.
    I am female but will always alas still be a genetic or natal male.
    I am who I am and I know it.
    Last edited by storm4u; 25-05-2009 at 10:25 AM.

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    I was extremely touched by this thread Storm and I admire you immensely for your courage and conviction in putting forward this thread. Many people in our society live sheltered lives and through lack of experience of life they have no understanding of the unknown regarding different people and their sexuality and identities. What they consider normal is social conditioning built into them due to perhaps their culture or upbringing. Sometimes I even wonder who comes up with the meanings of these words that describe people as transexual, transgender etc etc. I was very fortunate to have met Georgina Beyers many years ago when she was first undergoing the process of a sex change. Before meeting her I was totally deluded about my opinion regarding this topic. She would come into the office and we would discuss for hours the intricate details of her experiences regarding every aspect on the subject. I am very thankful that I could be totally honest with her. She is an amazing women of strength. Thankyou for your thoughts as it will answer the questions of those who are afraid to ask but inquisitive to know the answers.

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    Quote Originally Posted by storm4u View Post
    It is hard for people to understand us and one of the reasons is the meanings of the terms used. Alas often we T's dont agree on the definitions so that doesnt make it easier for str8 folk to understand. Here are some of my definitions and the way I see them.
    Transsexual TS - actually the word is incorrect and there is no such word really. If anything it should be Transsex but it is used to describe a person with a body that doesnt match the brain. MtF or Ftm. They are often on hormones and therefore likely in an MtF to stop them from getting an erection. If they have a penis, they dont like it recognised or to use it but working Trans will allow it because it goes with the job. they strive to be as fem as possible. Its not about 'sex' but about 'gender' to them. The most recognised medical belief these days is that it is something that happens within the developing fetus, some 8 weeks after conception and well before birth that causes this.
    MtF = male to female. Alas to often noticeable.
    FtM = female to male. Lots more around then most realise. I have been amazed. They often pass easily or are just seen as an effeminite male.
    Shemale - Usually still male. Not on a proper hormone regime as they still want to get it up and use it. Often will have had a boob job and be big breasted.
    Crossdresser/ Transvestite (CD/TV) - usually men who like to dress as women and often, but not always, for sexual gratification. Some just like the feel of sexy lingere or the different fabric textures. Some CD/TV are true Transsexuals just starting thier journey.
    DragQueens - men who dress OTT outlandishly female and are performers. Some are Bi and some str8.
    Transgender The word I hate as it should be someone who has crossed fully from one gender to the other. A sexchange (or should that be a gender change) Alas the word has been taken and used to lump all in the too hard basket. So it covers TS, CD, TV, intersex, DQ and more these days.
    I am female but will always alas still be a genetic or natal male.
    I am who I am and I know it.

    Worth making this a sticky post .. like the glossary on abbreviations ...

    for future refferance ....

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    Quote Originally Posted by talio View Post
    Worth making this a sticky post .. like the glossary on abbreviations ...

    for future refferance ....
    Appreciate it being made sticky but I do want to reitterate that the definitions I have given here are mine. There are some out there in the T community who will not necessarily agree with me. Some see a differance between CD and TV, some CD take offence at the sexual referance but I do point out that I havent said 'All' CD do it for sexual gratification. DragQueens may not agree with me but largely I believe they are generally accept.
    Thanks again and I welcome the chance to discuss, so ask away. I am VERY open.

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